Unless you have chosen to live with your head buried in the sand, you have likely realized that the same world we were raised is not the same world we’re raising children. Like yourself, parents are awakening, growing more frustrated, realizing they are essentially unheard and now are engaging greater in their children’s education than ever before.
Gone are the days that we can naively trust our children to essential strangers in their most precious years of life. We NEED parents to be engaging in their children’s education and overall well-being like never before. It needs to be clear that we are no longer interested in co-parenting with the government. We will no longer comply; we are not ok with our voices falling on deaf ears. We are not ok with continuing to fail our children. We are not ok with their failing grades. We are not ok with the mandates. We are not ok with the explicit material they are serving. We are not ok with the indoctrination. Our children are not ok. We are not ok. Our children are OURS.
The truth remains that we DO need parents and grandparents to stay in the fight for our kids within the system and work to overhaul it, but at what point does it make more sense to starve the beast and pull our children (and their funding) in masses for our voices to REALLY be heard and for the best interests of our kids? On average, a child is worth just shy of $15,500 for their enrollment…it won’t take long for our voices to be heard when that adds up. The boards DO NOT CARE. They are getting millions of dollars per district to listen well above you otherwise.
Frankly, the time is NOW.
In the heart of both yours and your children’s best interests…let’s talk about homeschool and what I have learned in the time I’ve been homeschooling myself. Some of it may surprise you. It may be nothing like you thought. Much as the world isn’t the same as when we were young, neither is homeschooling.
The difference is that homeschool has evolved in positive ways!
If you’re anything like I was, you never would have imagined you would even consider homeschool or be here reading now. If you see yourself or your children in my words, take heart that there’s no coincidence for you doing so. I am NOT a supermom. Homeschool moms (or dads) don’t have some supernatural patience. We just decided that the pros far outweigh the cons and went for it. I didn’t know everything before I withdrew our daughter; however, I have become better equipped along the way. It’s a journey, the same as life. I learn new things and ways all the time…
What I (falsely) believed homeschool was:
- Homeschool kids are WEIRD!
- These poor kids are on house arrest and not properly socialized.
- Only kids with notably biblical names like Isaiah or Ruth were homeschooled and sheltered from the world.
- Someone who “knows what they are doing” should be educating.
- Kids belong in a classroom of only their age all day, every day.
What homeschool ACTUALLY is:
- Homeschool kids are AWESOME!
- These poor kids in classrooms are on house arrest and not being TRULY socialized.
- All walks of life and world views homeschool and mix together.
- Parents were every child’s first educators and side by side will always trump 1 to 20-25 in a classroom.
- Kids belong in LIFE…and to be mixed with ages 0-100 on the regular.
How did we ever get to those myths in the first place!? And, what part of the whole child was taken into account for the model we adopted?
Allow me to share a bit of another perspective to consider more than just your frustrations with the schools in today’s world regardless of which frustration it was that brought you here. This is not about politics, though our children have become political pawns. It does not matter what brought you here, I hope you will learn something to greater equip you for your own journey and your reasons why to go for it!
Is it always easy? Not necessarily. Is it way less complicated and scary that I ever thought? YES! Has it been blessed? Are my children flourishing? Absolutely!
First, let me say that we are all doing our imperfect best regardless of the path we choose to take. It’s a complicated subject for a lot of families, and I realize that even though ANYONE can homeschool their children, not everyone should do it.
We’re all ultimately on the same team of wanting what we believe is best for our children in the perspectives that we each have. There are a couple of sayings that I really feel apply to this:
- You don’t know what you don’t know, and you don’t know that you don’t know it.
- When you know better, you do better.
I’m no exception to that. As a mother to young school age children, the more I understood about the public school system and child development – the less a classroom made sense. I realize the older your children are, the more strings and complications come alongside this decision. I became convicted in real ways that I could no longer argue against but could only act on in the best interest of my children’s mind, body and soul along with their enriched education.
Sometimes that isn’t “convenient” for me, but I realize this isn’t about me…it’s about my children and they are the most important job I could have, and all children deserve to be loved and educated wholly for the individuals they are.
It was years prior that my own homeschool seed was planted, and it just continues to grow stronger, more confirmed and convicted the more that I know and see. Though the seed was planted, it really was COVID that made it a natural move for us along with a Christian worldview and the desire for our own guidance to our children. It has gone so well for our family that we’ll continue until it just no longer makes sense, or our kids are grown, but with solid foundations to last a lifetime. After all, a child’s worldview is said to be formed by age 12-13.
It was only recently that I listened to a child development psychologist on the disturbing trend today of our children looking to peers for guidance and direction and how it interferes with healthy development and the breakdown of parental relationship and influence. Add social media and it only gets worse. The book is called, Hold On To Your Kids: Why Parents Need to Matter More Than Peers by Gordon Neufeld, Ph.D. He also has many talks online that you can find to listen to that are poignant, thought provoking and life changing material. You can no doubt learn and gain tools for your children of any age.
When we start to look at the overall well-being of our children and what our jobs as parents are, but we send them off at the very tender age of five (or sooner) to someone else’s influence of world view, behavior, authority, habits, etc…how can we ever be surprised when our children become Roman’s? We simply cannot. We’ve willfully sent them to Caesar without a second thought and then wonder why they become defiant or contradict our natural authority as parents. We’ve become complicit to co-parenting with the government and jumping through their hoops for education and otherwise most children just follow the herd of peers…do what they do, act like they act, dress like they dress…compare, compare, compare. The individual just isn’t considered, and peer approval becomes the goal over all else, but do you even know who or what that is?
The education system as well pays no mind to the fact that no child is the same. They develop different, look different, come from different backgrounds, learn different, mark success different, give and receive love different, boy’s and girl’s brains are literally wired different. All children have different interests, strengths, and weaknesses. How different would the record numbers of anxiety and pressures be if we removed that peripheral view for them? How much more confident of self would they be?
If a child is on either side of average, they are falling through the cracks in a school setting. Plain and simple. Being government run to leave “no child left behind”, they continue to dumb down and water down the material and teach instead to multiple choice state tests as a marker for funding and no more. Except those tests are fruitless and useless. They don’t mark intelligence or comprehension. They don’t mark thought or exploration, but so much of the curriculum is built for them. Otherwise, advanced classes are being dropped from even being offered and everyone is just set for mediocrity, indoctrination into liberal ideals and introduced to inappropriate and even sexually explicit material at an already confusing time in development. If you don’t believe that is occurring, please…ENGAGE!
Our children, our children’s children, depend on your engagement with them and with their education. In real ways. In time. In conversation. In guidance.
How are we to guide our future generations if the time isn’t there to have the conversations? I see it too often that kids get back to their parents and yet they have had entire days’ worth of thoughts and conversations but cannot or will not articulate back. According to a study in California, the average American family spends an average of 37 minutes per weekday of quality time; 2 hours & 40 minutes on weekends…that is only about 8 hours any given week. Who is actually raising them when you think of it like that? At what point do you connect heart to heart? Do you know what they are learning? Do you know what troubles they are having? Do you know the condition of their hearts and minds?
Your children need YOU. Sure, they need positive influence outside of you, but they need you and your guidance most of all. Without even addressing the benefits of the one-on-one attention to school work, when it comes to the heart of your child and the development of their whole being…homeschool easily becomes the answer.
When you think about the average child leaving home at 18 and having started school and outside influence at age 5…it’s no wonder that children are confused and don’t know who they are or what they want to be. Someone else who they may, or may not even respect has dictated to them for the majority of their life when to be where, what to learn, when they should learn it, when they can use the restroom, eat, speak or move their body. Line up and keep your hands to yourself. Now, 6’ apart. They are looking at their peers for who is doing what, when and comparing themselves to others who are comparing themselves the same.
Every child has a different learning curve and curiosity and when you are there to see where some extra attention is needed, what doesn’t work or where that curiosity is sparked…it makes their education more fun for everyone. There are no such things as failing classes in homeschool because homeschool is child led. You can speed up or slow down as necessary and even by strengths of subject. Something that can’t really be an option in a classroom model.
There are so many ways to educate and resources that haven’t always been. The greatest part of homeschool is the freedom to choose and educate best for your child’s optimal learning style and what fits your family.
Some options to consider:
- 100% literature based to fully online
- 100% free, sponsored to rather costly
- 100% parent directed to cooperatives for certain subjects or extracurricular
- University models to tutors
- Biblical worldview to secular
You’re fully free to decide and even change year to year, month to month. You’re fully free to decide who, what, when, where, why and how with the autonomy and sovereignty to do so. It is so much simpler that I ever expected it to be.
If that appeals to you, here is what you need to know about homeschooling in Missouri:
- Kindergarten is elective.
- Un-enroll an enrolled child by certified letter – do not sign their letter.
- Homeschool year runs 7/1 – 6/30 each year. If you had your child in school – the hours in school will count towards hours required.
- 1000 hours required (600 core – language arts, math, reading, handwriting, history, science & 400 non – PE, art, music, life, etc.) – there are NO rules for how that time is spent. Life is learning! Going to the zoo? Count it. Building Legos? Count it. Baking? Count it. Nature walk? Count it.
- Keep records starting at age 7 – 16 at beginning of school year – they do not have to be turned into anyone, but this is your legal ground.
- Assess your child’s best learning style & class level with online tests and choose curriculum that will compliment that and keeps it easy for you.
- Plug yourself into local homeschool groups for questions and support – Missouri Homeschoolers is a great one for general questions and answers. There are families from every walk from already stay at home moms/dads, grandparents educating, to full time working families that make it work.
Homeschool isn’t going to solve all the problems we and our children face today, but it’s a start. There is no more urgent or important job than taking back the hearts and minds of our children. I have always believed that “the most important work one can do will be within the walls of your own home”…just start there. You CAN do this.